*implode*

This flat-hunting stuff is seriously starting to do my head in. Imagine if I were actually buying- *shudder*- no thanks. I looked at two places this morning which were alright but didn't grab me- if I could have combined elements from both there would have been something perfect but it doesn't work like that, does it?

The house where we stayed in Devon is occupied by an avid gardener so I spent the weekend trolling through books of eye candy. I'm not really a gardener- I mean I love growing stuff, I definitely love planning it all out (landscaping was one of the design avenues I contemplated trotting down before I settled on graphics)- it's just the maintenance and drudgery of weeding that holds little appeal... But there was a book on gardens created with pot plants and there were all these amazing ideas and arrangements and then Sarah called me to tell me that a flat she'd looked at that morning had a rooftop area..... Well you can just imagine the tangent that Little AyniaBrain went off on there. I practically have it planned out already. Apparently the estate agents aren't allowed ot advertise it as having a rooftop area because it isn't "safe" because it isn't fenced in on all sides so there's a nasty drop on one side- but you could create a barrier with pots... Oh yes, I haven't been in the place and I already want it bad. Sarah is worried that I won't like my bedroom and that will put me off but I'm prepared to be open-minded. The thought of outside space where I can swing my poi, not to mention created some swanky potted glory. Honestly, my daydreaming will be the end of me- it so often ends in disappointment.

So once again, I find myself going, "Please God (or whoever), please pretty please let this place be nice (oh yeah- another bonus, it's supercheap) and everything I want it to be and let us get it." Except then I realise that I don't really believe in God- or if I do, I believe there's about as much point in them existing as there is in my being here, which might piss them off a bit. My existentialism is at the point where I think Gods may exist, in fact I'm fine with the existence of higher powers in general and there being something that can stick in it's omniscient finger and stir things up a bit but, and here's the clincher- I don't think there's any more meaning in their existence than there is in mine. So sure, they can be all-powerful and all-knowing but when it comes down to it, there's not point in them being around either and if anything, their only meaning comes from what we give to them which means they need us more than we need them and that's not something that powerful beings would like to be reminded off or so I would think. So I guess I'm effectively shooting myself in the foot. Oh well. And so as I sign off, I cast a winsome smile heaven-wards and cross my fingers...

And finally- but most importantly- how, I mean HOW could you guys come down in favour of the blender? How does that work? A toaster would totally kick ass. And I know it goes against the grain for people to actually, God forbid, comment, but I'd love to hear reasons... I'll put on a new one tomorrow.